My Wildest Dreams… (aren’t all that WILD)

 20 Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly, abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, 21 to Him be glory” Ephesians 3:20-21

It is Monday. I called in to work.

I needed a mental health day. I woke up this morning knowing that nothing was markedly WRONG in my life, but nothing was RIGHT either.

I know this feeling. I’ve felt it before. And so, I dissect until I figure out why I’m unsettled.

A friend from high school asked me the other day “Hey, are you still writing?”. The question burned me up because I was wondering: Why does he have to ask that question? Why isn’t he aware that I’m still writing?

Krystal, perhaps he does not know you’re still writing because you haven’t been.

You see, I’m lazy.

There it is. The truth. I haven’t been reading. Haven’t been writing. Haven’t been studying. I have casually spent my days doing nothing that helps me grow. Leisurely passing time by gaining weight and being very unproductive. So, when I woke up this morning I felt it. The pull.

I felt the pressure, the stretching, the discomfort that comes from a grieved, disquieted spirit.

I got out of bed, listened to some TV and YouTube sermons (again, too lazy to read my Bible)  and Brian Houston caught my heart. He was ministering on closing the GAP in your life.

He said that people have two points of interest in life:

  • The maximized, full potential given to them by the grace/goodness of GOD; and
  • The potential that they actually reach before they die.

If you’ve ever seen a person walking in the fullness of God’s grace you know it’s a breathtaking view. Their life epitomizes Ephesians 3:20-21. Their dreams become exponentially multiplied and you’re in such awe of the moment that you are just grateful to be able to stand by and see it take place. It’s not even your life, but you’re ecstatic that God is doing it for them! You smile because you know they’ve reached that point. They’re at the meridian, the apex, they are living the life that is ‘full in the fullness of God’(Eph.3:19 msg).

I’ve been watching the Rio 2016 Olympics and have been questioning—Why is it so rare that we meet people that are exactly where GOD designed them to be? Am I the only person who sees these people as the exception?

Why doesn’t everyone achieve that maximized given-by-the-grace-of-God success?

Why don’t our lives ever measure up to God’s glory in each of us?

According to Brian Houston, too few people ever close the gap between where they are and where they COULD be. We spend so much time saying what kind of Christian we are, masquerading lives of holiness and sanctification, we never fully allow God to get us where He’d have us. We think we’re good, but we’re not even close to where God would have us perform.

So I hit the reset button this morning.

I asked God to help me become braver, stronger, clearer in my writing.

I asked him to help make me the writer that lives only in my head. Make me the woman that lives only in my heart. Make me the Christian that rests somewhere in the bottom of my belly, that only He’s ever gotten the chance to meet.

Besides, all I ever wanted to do with my life was become a wife, a mother, and an author… 3 dreams I’m sure He could manifest at some point… heck, 31 years have already passed by, the least I could do is give God something He could work with!

Thanks for reading,

Eve Unyoked

 

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